Choosing your wedding party is a big deal! These are the people that are going to be there to support you through the whole wedding planning process - you'll need them there to empathise with you when Other People's Opinions are getting you down but also, to tell you to cop on already when you're crying over peony shades when in the grand scheme of things, it won't matter.

They'll keep you on track, be your biggest cheerleaders and help you on your way to the all important day - but at the same time it's also a lovely way to honour the people who have already been amazing to you and your partner. So, the short answer to how to choose your wedding party is to think about what you want, who you want, what they want and ultimately, what you need.

The long answer to choosing who will be in your corner for your wedding day? These seven golden rules should help you on your way to choosing the dream wedding party.


Take your time

In the excitement, it can be tempting to ask every close friend you tell about your engagement to be in your bride tribe. Hold fi re until you’ve had a chance to mull over all the options. Ask yourself, will I still be as close to this person in five years’ time?


What kind of bride/groom are you?

Before you decide who’ll make a good bridesmaid, ask yourself what you need. Do you want some fun gal pals to get excited with and have one hell of a hen? Or do you crave a reliable team of co-planners?


Don’t rule anyone out based on their gender

Tradition brings with it some lovely rituals, but it shouldn’t dictate that your best male friend can’t be in your wedding party, alongside your ’maids. And we think that fab, female friend will make a deadly best woman.


Do I have to ask her, just because she asked me?

Whilst it would be ideal to always return the favour, you might have been a bridesmaid for three or four friends already and you can’t ask everyone, particularly if you also have a gaggle of sisters. So no, it’s not the rule, but manage expectations by communicating openly about it.


Include your siblings

Your siblings are your mates for life (even if you kill each other sometimes), so try to include them in your wedding party, if you can.

A lopsided wedding party is A-OK

Your wedding party is not a set of accounts, it doesn’t have to balance. If she’s asked her three best friends but you want four groomsmen, it’s really no biggie.

You don’t have to have one!

Maybe you think you and your sister will manage just fine or you don’t have the budget to dress five fabulous females. That’s perfectly fine – wedding tradition is not the boss of you.



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